Kesukaan Besar

"Lalu kata malaikat itu kepada mereka: 'Jangan takut, sebab sesungguhnya aku memberitakan kepadamu kesukaan besar untuk seluruh bangsa: Hari ini telah lahir bagimu Juruselamat, yaitu Kristus Tuhan, di kota Daud.'" --Lukas 2:10+11--

Kesukaan besar untuk seluruh bangsa. Tatkala saya membaca kata-kata itu, saya selalu teringat seorang nenek yang tua, yang wajahnya keriput, dan belakangnya terbungkuk. Dia begitu terbungkuk karena ketuaannya, sampai tangannya hampir sampai di tanah. Oleh karena itu, orang memanggil dia "nenek bongko" (Bahasa Kupang untuk seorang nenek yang terbungkuk). Saya sendiri tidak mengingat namanya karena selalu ingat dia sebagai "nenek bongko" saja. 

Nenek bongko sudah sangat tua. Dengan mengingat tubuhnya nenek, ada ayat firman Tuhan yang muncul di otak saya, "...meskipun manusia lahiriah kami semakin merosot, namun manusia batiniah kami dibaharui dari sehari ke sehari" (II Kor.4:16b). Memang, nenek bongko sudah menjadi manusia yang baru. Nenek mengaku Yesus sebagai Juruselamat di masa tuanya dan dibaptis oleh suami saya di gereja kami. Sejak itu, nenek terlihat penuh sukacita dan damai sejahtera! Tiap hari dia bangun dan merasa hari itu adalah hari penuh harapan, meskipun pasti tubuhnya yang terbungkuk itu membuat dia kesakitan tiap hari. Tetapi saya tidak pernah dengar dia mengeluh. Orang-orang disekitarnya tidak pernah mengira kalau dia merasa kesakitan karena dia selalu menyapa orang dengan senyum yang lebar. Tiap minggu nenek bongko akan bertanya kepada anak-anaknya dan cucu-cucunya apakah hari ini sudah hari minggu? Dia begitu rindu untuk kembali ke rumah Tuhan untuk mendengar penjelasan Firman Tuhan! Tiap hari setelah itu, dia akan bertanya lagi, "Apakah hari ini sudah hari Minggu?" Sampai hari Sabtu baru nenek bongko mendapat jawaban yang memuaskan. "Besok adalah hari Minggu. Besok kita pergi ke gereja." Dan besok pagi-pagi sekali nenek bongko bangun, mandi, dan siap diri untuk pergi ke gereja. Dia memakai pakaian yang rapi dan dia jalan kaki arah ke gereja. Saudara-saudara, dengar baik-baik, nenek bongko jalan kaki bukan di jalan yang rata, tapi dia jalan kaki sambil menaiki gunung! Pelahan-lahan, hati-hati supaya tidak jatuh (tetapi satu kali memang dia jatuh!) Dia harus berhenti beberapa kali sejenak, agar bisa mendapat tenaga lagi sehingga bisa sampai di atas. Meskipun keadaan begitu sulit, tidak ada sesuatu (kecuali nenek benar-benar sakit) baru dia alpa untuk ikut ibadah gereja pada hari Minggu.

Luar biasa bukan? Seringkali kita yang lahir dalam keluarga Kristen dan tiap hari mendengar injil, sayangnya kita anggap enteng kabar injil dan tidak benar-benar merasa kesukaan besar. Tapi marilah kita kembali ke kebenaran yang simpel dan indah. Kebanyakan dari kita sudah merayakan kebenaran itu minggu lalu pada tanggal 25 Desember. Kebenaran itu adalah kabar baik yang pertama kali disampaikan oleh malaikat kepada gembala-gembala di padang dekat Betlehem. Lebih dari 2000 tahun yang lalu di kota Daud telah lahir Juruselamat bagi kita, yaitu Kristus Tuhan. Bagi kita -- saudara-saudara dan saya! Yang lahir itu bukan saja bayi Ibrani yang mungil yang membawa sukacita bagi orang tuanya, tetapi dia adalah Mesias yang sudah dijanjikan sejak tahun-tahun yang lalu dan dia membawa kesukaan yang besar bagi seluruh bangsa! Dia adalah Anak Allah yang dikirim ke dunia untuk menggenapi rencana keselamatan untuk kita, dan untuk memperbaiki hubungan kita dengan Tuhan. Oleh karena itu, di dalam Mazmur 103:12 katakan, "sejauh timur dari barat, demikian dijauhkanNya dari pada kita pelanggaran kita." Wow!! Puji Tuhan untuk itu!! Marilah kita setiap hari berterima kasih kepada Tuhan untuk hadiah yang luar biasa dan indah itu!!

Jikalau Suadara menyukai artikel ini dan Saudara belum follow, silahkan klik "follow" jikalau Saudara ingin mendapat notifikasi untuk artikel-artikel saya yang baru, atau klik "subscribe via email" agar bisa memperoleh posting yang baru dalam inbox email.  Terima kasih banyak kepada teman-teman yang sudah buat itu, atau sudah memberikan support atau dorongan untuk saya dalam membuat blog ini. Selamat Natal dan kiranya Tuhan memberkati dan menguatkan Saudara dalam Tahun 2021!

Great Joy!

 "But the angel said to them, 'Do not be afraid. I bring good news that will cause great joy for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; He is the Messiah, the Lord.'"       --Luke 2: 10+11--

Good news that will cause great joy. When I read those words I remember an old, wrinkled and hunched up woman. She was so hunched up that she was almost doubled over at the waist. For that reason, she was simply referred to as "nenek bongko" (the crooked grandmother). Please do not misunderstand; that name was not used with disrespect or derision, but rather it was a pet name that had stuck and was said with love. 

It was evident that "the crooked grandmother" was "outwardly...wasting away, yet inwardly...being renewed day by day" (II Cor.4:16). And indeed, what a beautiful old lady she was! She had come to believe in Jesus as her Savior and Lord in her old age, and had been baptized by my husband in our church. And how excited she was! She was filled with joy that Jesus was her Savior. Every day was a bright new day full of hope, even though I am sure her poor stiff body must have ached with great pain every day. But I never once heard her complain about it and wouldn't have guessed it by the big toothless smile with which she greeted both young and old. Every week she would start asking her children and grandchildren on Wednesday already, "Is it Sunday yet? Can we go to church and hear more from that preacher about God?" The next day she would ask the same question, and on until Saturday, when she would get a satisfying answer, "Tomorrow is Sunday. Tomorrow we go to church." She would be up very early the next morning, get herself ready in her Sunday best and walk up the steep hill to the church, making her way bit by bit to the church building. She had to rest a couple times, to catch her breath, and one time she even fell on her way up that hill. But nothing could keep her from attending that worship service. 

How cool is that?! Those of us who were born into Christian families and grew up hearing the gospel over and over, sometimes unfortunately take things for granted and don't often get really excited about the message of salvation. But let's go back to thinking about the simple truth of the gospel, which most of us celebrated last week, and was the exciting news first brought by the angel to the shepherds in the fields near Bethlehem. Let's listen again, with fresh ears to that news. A little over 2000 years ago in the town of David a Savior was born to us -- to you and to me!! He wasn't just a cute little Jewish baby, but He was the promised Messiah, God's Son sent into the world to fulfill God's plan of salvation from sin and restore our relationship with God. Because of that, as it says in Psalm 103:12 "as far as the east is from the west, so far has He removed our transgressions from us." Wow!! Praise God for that!! Let's thank God every day for that wonderful gift!!

 If you like these posts, and haven't already done so, please either "follow" (to get notifications of new posts) or "subscribe via email" (to get the posts sent to you in your email inbox). Thank you so much to all who have already done so, or who have supported or encouraged me in different ways in my blogging journey. Merry Christmas and a blessed New Year to you all!

Diamlah dan Ketahuilah

 Gunung. Arjuno, dilihat dari dekat rumah

    Tanda-tanda bahwa hari Natal sudah dekat. Anak kami yang bungsu sementara latihan untuk drama Natal di sekolahnya. Di rumah-rumah juga sudah dihiasi dengan dekorasi Natal. Tatkala saya masuk toko-toko tertentu saya sudah mendengar lagu-lagu Natal. Itu semua menunjukan kalau hari Natal sudah dekat. Tetapi, Natal tahun ini merasa berbeda sekali! Ada masker-masker, ada peraturan-peraturan dari pemerintah, ada juga tempat-tempat yang lockdown, dan berita yang didengar sering mengagetkan. Saya jujur, saya melarang diri untuk mendengar atau menonton berita sebelum tidur malam. Karena, kalau saya mendengar atau menonton dan berita itu membuat rasa tegang maka saya menjadi sulit untuk tidur. Saya ingin merasa seperti raja Daud di Mazmur 4:8: "Dengan tenteram aku mau membaringkan diri, lalu segera tidur, sebab hanya Engkaulah, ya TUHAN, yang membiarkan aku diam dengan aman." Hanya kadang sulit juga.

   

    Beberapa hari yang lalu tatkala saya mengenderai mobil saya di dekat rumah saya, saya melihat pemandangan Gunung Arjuno yang luar biasa indahnya. Karena begitu gagah, saya lalu memberhentikan mobil saya dan saya duduk sejenak untuk melihat pemandangan itu. Kata-kata dari Mazmur 46 ayat 10 masuk di otak saya. "Diamlah dan ketahuilah, bahwa Akulah Allah! Aku ditinggikan di antara bangsa-bangsa, ditinggikan di bumi!" Memang, di Mazmur 8 dituliskan bahwa ciptaan Tuhan memberitahukan semua tentang kebesaran Tuhan. Di tengah-tengah dunia kacau begini, Gunung Arjuno yang gagah itu bicara kepada saya dengan terang. Mazmur 8:2 atau 10: "Ya TUHAN, Tuhan kami, betapa mulianya nama-Mu di seluruh bumi! Keagungan-Mu yang mengatasi langit dinyanyikan." Ambilah waktu hari ini untuk diam. Diamlah dan ketahuilah bahwa Allah kita adalah Allah yang mahakuasa.

    Jikalau suadara menyukai artikel ini dan Saudara belum follow, silahkan klik "follow" jikalau Saudara ingin mendapat notifikasi untuk artikel-artikel saya yang baru, atau klik "subscribe via email" agar bisa memperoleh posting yang baru dalam inbox email.  Terima kasih banyak kepada teman-teman yang sudah buat itu, atau sudah memberikan support atau dorongan untuk saya dalam membuat blog ini. Tuhan Yesus memberkati.

Be Still

 

Mt. Arjuno, seen from close by our home

    I don't know about you, but I have been seeing definite signs of Christmas lately. Our youngest child has been practicing for her school Christmas play, we have put up some Christmas decorations in our house, I hear Christmas music when I enter certain stores,... It definitely feels like Christmas is near. And yet, so different. The world seems so different than the world of last Christmas. The masks, the restrictions, the fear, the disturbing news reports, etc. I admit I have to be careful these days, that I don't watch any news right before going to bed. If I do, and it happens to be something shocking, scary, or controversial, then I might not get to sleep for some time, because of the many thoughts swirling around and around in my head. At those times, the truth of Psalm 4:8 is a far cry from reality. There David says, "In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, Lord, make me dwell in safety."

    But the other day as I was driving near my home, this view of Mt. Arjuno took my breath away. The photo (above) that I took, does not do justice to the beautiful view that I saw. I stopped my car to stare at it for a few moments. The words of Psalm 46:10 came to my mind. "He says, 'Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.'" In Psalm 8, David basically says that God's creation speaks out about how great and glorious is our God. Indeed, in the midst of these chaotic times that we are living in, that beautiful mountain spoke out loud and clear to me. "Lord, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth!" (Ps.8:1 / 9) Try to take a few moments today to just be still and listen. You might be surprised at what you hear!

    If you like these posts, and haven't already done so, please either "follow" (to get notifications of new posts) or "subscribe via email" (to get the posts sent to you in your email inbox). Thank you so much to all who have already done so, or who have supported or encouraged me in different ways in this new blogging journey. God bless you all!

Bersukacita di atas Jiwa yang Rapuh

Di bawah ini adalah ringkasan yang saya buat dari khotbah Pendeta Winston Bosch atas ijinannya. Khotbah ini berdasarkan Mazmur 42. Untuk edisi bahasa Inggrisnya saudara dapat membaca di blog saya yang berjudul: "Fight for Joy in the Hour of Discouragement". Sebagai informasi, Pendeta Winston melayani sebagai hamba Tuhan di Gereja Reformasi "Jubilee" di Kanada.

    Pernahkah saudara bermain ayunan jungkat-jungkit sejak masa kecil? Atau pernahkah saudara membawa adik / anak / cucu untuk bermain di atas ayunan jungkat-jungkit? Atau paling sedikit saudara pernah melihat mainan tersebut di depan gedung Kelompok Bermain atau Taman Kanak-kanak. Tatkala saya masih kecil saya suka sekali main di atas ayunan ini. Ayunan jungkat ini selalu naik turun, naik turun bergantung berat ringan yang bermain. Lebih asyik lagi kalau di satu bahagian ada dua orang sehingga di bahagian yang lain terbang tinggi ke langit. 

    Sebagaimana ayunan jungkat-jungkit yang selalu naik dan turun demikian juga sukacita dan kesedihan, pengharapan dan putus asa, kepuasan dan ketidakpuasan sering terjadi dalam hidup kita. Kadang-kadang harapan kita tercapai secara luar biasa dan kita merasa senang dan bersukacita. Tetapi taklala pengharapan itu hilang, maka kita menjadi putus asa dan kita merasa down, sedih, stress, bahkan bisa menjadi sedikit depresi. Itulah hidup. Karena setiap orang memiliki sifat dan keadaan hidup yang berbeda, bahkan hormon dalam tubuh yang berbeda, maka keadaannya jiwapun berbeda-beda naik dan turunnya tiap hari sama seperti ayunan jungkat-jungkit. Bagaimana dengan keadaan saudara saat ini? Apakah saudara berada di atas atau di bawa ayunan jungkat-jungkit? Mazmur 42 menyaksikan perasaan pemazmur yang kadang-kadang naik dan tiba-tiba menurun. Mazmur 42 menggambarkan hidup yang nyata. Tetapi mazmur ini mengajarkan kita sesuatu yang lebih penting, yaitu, bagaimana kita bisa bersukacita di atas jiwa yang rapuh.

    Di dalam Mazmur 42 ayat 1 tertulis: "Untuk pemimpin biduan. Nyanyian pengajaran bani Korah." Bani Korah adalah penyanyi-penyanyi dalam Bait Suci. Dalam ayat ini kita diajak untuk membaca dan mendengar Mazmur 42 ini secara pribadi. Biarkan mazmur ini bicara kepada hidup saudara atau kepada hidup keluarga saudara.

    Tolong baca ayat 2 sampai ayat 4. Kita melihat langsung bahwa pemazmur mulai dengan perasaan putus asa. Kadang-kadang kita juga merasa seperti itu, kan? Perhatikan bahwa pemazmur tidak katakan: "Seperti rusa merindukan sungai yang berair, deminkianlah jiwaku merindukan pertolongan dan kesembuhan." Tidak. Pemazmur tidak mencari solusi yang sementara seperti meminta plester luka atau meminta badan diurut. Dia merindukan Tuhan sendiri dan kehadiranNya. Dia menulis: "demikianlah jiwaku merindukan Engkau, ya Allah." Dia membutuhkan Tuhan seperti binatang-binatang yang memerlukan air untuk hidup. Dan dia bertanya kepada Allah, "Kapan Tuhan? Kapan aku boleh melihat Engkau?" Barangkali dia ingin pergi ke Bait Suci di Yerusalem. Tetapi dia bukan mau kesitu karena tradisi, saudara-saudara, tetapi jiwanya rapuh dan dia merasa haus untuk melihat kehadiran Allah. Apakah saudara juga terkadang merasa seperti itu? Apakah saudara merasa tegang atau sedih atau putus asa karena masalah-masalah yang menumpuk dalam hidup saudara? Apakah saudara merinduhkan Tuhan dalam hidup saudara?

    Setelah itu, pemazmur berbicara tentang air matanya yang mengalir. "Air mataku menjadi makananku siang dan malam." Pernahkah saudara mengalami seperti itu? Akhibat dari beban-beban yang terlalu berat, sehingga saudara hanya bisa menangis saja. Pada malam hari saudara tidak bisa tidur karena kawatir, lalu di pagi hari saudara langsung berpikir tentang kekawatiran itu. Apakah kadang-kadang saudara menangis di belakang pintu kamar? Apakah mungkin saudara sementara menahan air mata sekarang, sambil membaca tulisan ini? Terkadang kita sulit untuk menjelaskan beban itu kepada orang lain. Kita merasa seperti tidak ada orang yang mengerti situasi kita. Pemazmur juga merasa seperti itu. Orang-orang di sekitar pemazmur bukan hanya tidak mengerti, tetapi mereka bahkan mengoloknya. Mereka berkata,"Di mana Allahmu?" Berat sekali!

    Di ayat 5, si pemazmur merindukan masa lalunya yang indah. Coba saudara membacanya. Dia mengingat momen-momen indah yang dulu dia rasakan tatkala dia merasa dekat sekali dengan Tuhan. Waktu dia beramai-ramai dengan jemaat Tuhan melangkah ke rumah Tuhan sambil bersorak-sorai memuji Tuhan. Saudarapun mungkin pernah merasa momen-momen indah tatkala saudara menikmati fellowship dengan Tuhan dan dengan jemaatnya. 

    Di ayat 6, ayunan jungkat-jungkit berubah posisi. Ayat ini juga adalah ref dalam lagu ini. Kata-kata ini diulang lagi di ayat 12 dan sekali lagi di Mazmur 43:5. Pemazmur disini tidak bicara kepada Tuhan ataupun kepada orang lain, tetapi dia bicara kepada diri sendiri. Sepertinya, di tengah-tengah penderitaannya dia berhenti sejenak dan katakan kepada diri sendiri: “Sabar dulu. Saya tidak mau menjadi budak kepada perasaan saya sendiri. Jiwaku, dengar baik-baik. Mengapa engkau tertekan? Berharaplah kepada Allah!” Saudara-saudara, ini adalah kebiasaan yang bagus. Marilah kita melatih diri sendiri untuk tidak dengar dan tidak percaya penipuan-penipuan yang ada di dalam otak kita, tetapi bicara kebenaran Tuhan kepada diri sendiri. Ini adalah positive thinking yang alkitabia. Ini adalah kebenaran Tuhan yang menolong kita untuk bersukacita di atas jiwa yang rapuh.

    Di ayat yang ke-7 dan ke-8 posisi ayunan jungkat-jungkit berubah lagi dimana perasaan pemazmur menjadi putus asa lagi. Di ayat 6 pemazmur bertanya: “Mengapa engkau tertekan hai jiwaku?” dan langsung di ayat berikut dia katakan: “Jiwaku tertekan dalam diriku.” Sebelumnya mata si pemazmur tertujuh kepada Tuhan dan sekarang matanya tertujuh kepada situasi yang sulit yang dia hadapi. Inilah hidup, saudara, di dunia ini. Masalah-masalah yang kita hadapi itu real dan berat dan tidak ada solusi-solusi yang gampang.

    Di dalam ayat yang ke-9 mainan jungkat-jungkit berubah lagi. Emosional si pemazmur berubah lagi secara drastis. Seperti pemazmur tadi lagi tenggelam sampai meminum air, tetapi sekarang dia melihat semua menjadi cerah. Saya paling suka kalimat itu: “Tuhan memerintahkan kasih setianya pada siang hari.” Di Bahasa Ibrani, sebenarnya kata itu bukan kasih setia, tetapi “hesed” yang artinya “kebaikan, belas kasihan, kesetiaan, dan rahmat dari Allah Perjanjian kita, meskipun kita tidak layak untuk menerima itu.” Di dalam ayat ini, Tuhan memerintahkan hesednya atau kasih setianya untuk kita. Kasih Tuhan itu bukan sesuatu yang asal-asal saja bagi kita. Tetapi Tuhan justru memerintahkan kasih setiaNya untuk setiap kita secara pribadi. Luar biasa saudara! Tatkala ayunan jungkat-jungkit menurun ke bawah, ingatlah bahwa Tuhan memerintahkan kasih setianya untuk saudara.

   Di ayat 10 dan 11 sekali lagi pemazmur menulis tentang kesedihannya. Dia bertanya kepada Tuhan: “Mengapa Engkau melupakan aku?” Emosional kita kadang-kadang memang begitu. Emosional kita kadang-kadang seperti musim semi di Kanada. Kadang-kadang saya keluar rumah saya, merasa sinar matahari yang hangat dan saya ingin memakai celana pendek dan bermain bola basket bersama dengan anak-anak saya. Tiba-tiba hari esok suhu menurun sampai minus 17 derajat Celsius dan saya tidak ingin keluar dari tempat tidurku! Inilah hidup saudara!

    Di sini kita melihat bahwa memazmur merasa penindasan oleh musuh-musuhnya. Dia merasa terganggu, kesakitan, dihina, dan lain sebagainya. Kadang-kadang kita juga bisa rasakan itu. Kadang-kadang orang lain tidak mengerti keadaan kita, dan mereka meremehkan penderitaan kita atau menghina kita. Sangat berat. Pemazmur katakan bahwa dia merasa seperti ada tikaman maut di dalam tulangnya. Dia merasa hampir mau mati saja. Kadang di dalam hidup kita, kita merasa begitu tertekan dengan sesuatu beban hidup dan begitu stress menghadapi hidup sehingga kita merasa seperti mau mati saja. Firman Tuhan seperti Mazmur 42 ini menunjukan bahwa Tuhan mengetahui dan mengerti dan peduli akan penderitaan kita.

    Saudara, kadang-kadang pikiran kita yang negatif bertumbuh menjadi banyak. Oleh karena kita merenungkan tentang hal yang negatif, maka pikiran negatif itu dibesar-besarkan oleh otak kita sendiri. Akhirnya, kita tidak bisa berpikir apa-apa lagi secara positif. Tantangan bagi kita adalah bagaimana kita memberhentikan pikiran-pikiran yang negatif itu sambil merenungkan tentang kasih setia Tuhan. Itu yang pemazmur jalankan. 

    Silahkan membaca ayat 12. Ayat ini ada baiknya jika saudara mencatatnya lalu menggantungkannya di atas dinding atau kulkas saudara. Ayat ini juga bagus untuk dihafalkan di luar kepala. Berharaplah kepada Allah! Mengingat janji-janjinya! Dia adalah keselamatan saudara! Dia adalah Allah yang penuh kasih setia…sejak dulu, sekarang, dan selama-lamanya.

    Di akhir mazmur ini, ternyata pengharapannya menjadi menang. Mengapa? Pengharapan menang karena Tuhan sudah menang! Kita pasti akan menderita dalam hidup ini tetapi Tuhan kita bukan Allah yang jauh dan yang tidak mengerti tentang penderitaan kita. Allah kita, lewat Yesus Kristus, juga merasakan penderitaan. Tuhan Yesus, tatkala di atas kayu salib, telah berseruh dengan suara nyaring: “AllahKu, AllahKu, mengapa Engkau meninggalkan Aku?” Dia menderita supaya kita bisa diselamatkan. Di dalam Tuhan Yesus kita menjadi menang dan pengharapan kita tercapai dengan luar biasa.

    Jika saudara merasa putus asa, dan jiwa saudara menjadi rapuh akibat pikiran-pikiran negatif yang datang dari segala macam arah dan bermacam masalah hidup, ingatlah akan Mazmur 42 ini. Berharaplah pada Tuhan dan peganglah janji-janjiNya. Ingatlah akan kemenangan kita dalam Tuhan Yesus Kristus. 

    Nyanyikanlah lagu ini dengan suara yang lantang dan dengan sepenuh hati sambil mengingat akan kasih setia Tuhan dalam Tuhan Yesus. Bagikanlah mazmur ini kepada keluarga dan teman-teman, dan siapa saja yang lagi berjuang dalam keputusasaan. Bersukacita di atas jiwa yang rapuh. 

“S’perti rusa rindu sungaimu
Jiwaku rindu Engkau
Kaulah Tuhan hasrat hatiku
Kurindu menyembahMu
Kaulah kekuatan dan perisaiku
KepadaMu rohmu berserah
Kaulah Tuhan hasrat hatiku
Kurindu menyembahMu…”

Fight for Joy in the Hour of Discouragement

The following is a beautiful sermon by Pastor Winston Bosch on Psalm 42 that was adapted, with his permission, for this blog page. Winston currently serves as pastor of “Jubilee” Canadian Reformed Church in Ottawa, Canada.

Introduction

Do you remember as a child playing on a teeter totter? Or have you recently helped your younger sibling, child or grandchild onto one?  When I was a kid I loved going on the teeter totter – up and down, up and down. It was especially fun when one of us bumped the other one right off the teeter totter up into the air!

Happiness and sadness, hope and despair, contentment and discouragement; they can go up and down too, just like those teeter totters. Sometimes hope is up high, everything is great, and we are feeling good, enthusiastic and happy. Then there are those moments when hope falls down and despair surges up and we are so down and discouraged, even depressed. Depending on what kind of person you are, your particular life circumstances, and what is going on in your body chemically or hormonally, the teeter totter can go up or down, one side or the other, sometimes multiple times a day! You know what I’m talking about? I wonder how you are doing right now.  Which way is the teeter-totter leaning for you today as you read this?

We see these teeter totter emotions in Psalm 42. The author goes back and forth, up and down between hope and despair. One moment he is up high and the next he is down low. Up and down, up and down, hope and despair, confidence and discouragement, joy and depression. This is a psalm that puts to words what we often feel in everyday life. But it does something more than that. Psalm 42 teaches us something really important. It teaches us how to fight for joy in the hour of discouragement.

So here’s what we are going to do. We are going to play on the teeter-totter of Psalm 42. We are going to look at Psalm 42 verse by verse so that we can fight for joy in the hour of discouragement.

The Title

Have a look at the title of this Psalm: “To the choirmaster. A Maskil of the Sons of Korah.” A maskil is a kind of song. The sons of Korah were temple singers, but we don’t know who specifically wrote this psalm. Perhaps the author was in exile or somewhere else far from Jerusalem. Whatever the case, we know for sure that he is having trouble and that he speaks in a very personal way. And that is how you should read Psalm 42. If you want to really get something from this psalm, you have to try to read it and listen to it in a personal way. Let it speak to your own personal life or to the life of someone close to you.

Verse 1-3

OK. Let’s get on the teeter-totter. The psalmist starts with despair and discouragement. His words give voice to our own despair and discouragement. Please take a moment to read verses 1- 3.

Notice that the psalmist does not say as a deer pants for flowing streams so pants my soul for healing and help. Healing and help are important, but when deep suffering pushes you down, your deepest need is God Himself. “My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.”  The Psalmist isn’t looking for some temporary solution; he doesn’t want a Band-Aid or a backrub. He wants the living God to show up. He wants the real presence of the real God.  He needs this like an animal needs water to survive.

So the cry of the psalmist breaks out in verse 2: When? When God? When shall I come and appear before you? He is probably talking about his desire to go to the temple in Jerusalem, but this is not a guy who just wants to go to church on Sunday morning. His soul is suffering; his heart, the center of who he is, is thirsting for the presence of the living God. He is crying out, “When? When is God going to show up?”

I wonder if this word “when” is also your cry of suffering? Maybe even at this very moment? Are you sick and tired of suffering, of the pain, of the hopelessness, of the expectations placed on you? Are you desperate for things to change in your life? Are you discouraged dear brother, dear sister? Do you have this desire for God to do something, this need for God to show up and change things in your life, or in the life of your loved ones? Enough already. When God? When? I need you!

And so the tears begin to fall. The 3^rd verse says, “My tears have been my food day and night.” Maybe you know what that is like. Your difficulties, your troubles, your worries -- are they the last thing you think about before your go to sleep and the first thing that comes to mind when you wake up? Are you sometimes shedding tears behind the closed doors of your home? Are you holding them back right now? Are you discouraged? Are you depressed?

It is possible as a Christian to have a strong and sincere faith and a dark and difficult depression. Depression is not necessarily a sign of a lack of faith. The great English preacher Charles Spurgeon, known for his great passion for the Lord and for the Word, and who is sometimes called the prince of preachers, was also someone who fought long and hard with depression. He once said, “Sometimes, I spend the whole day on my bed crying like a child, and I don’t know why.” Everyone gets discouraged from time to time; some of us get really depressed. Are you or someone you love living in a season of discouragement?  Are you or someone you love living with depression?

When that is the case it is hard to explain your suffering to others, isn’t it? One of the hardest parts of emotional suffering or unseen chronic pain is that feeling that no one understands. In this psalm the people around the author do more than just ‘not understand’. In verse 3 they say, “Where is your God?” In verse 2 the question was “When O God?” Now the question is, “Where are you God?” And this is the question par excellence of suffering. This is the question that cries out for an answer when things are not going well in life. But God, I am your child, and I’m suffering. Where are you? Where are you when things are bad? Have you ever thought or asked this question? Have you ever asked it through gritted teeth and tear filled eyes? Have you ever prayed what you think you are supposed to pray, those good prayers full of clichés, but then wondered in the back of your head, “But what use is this anyways? Where is God?”

Verse 4

In verse 4, the discouraged psalmist starts pining for the good old days. Have a look at it.

He is thinking about those good moments when his faith was strong and he was feeling encouraged. Those times when his relationship with God felt really on fire and he actually enjoyed worship. A far cry from what he is feeling now. Do you ever have those daydreams about the good old days? Don’t get me wrong, it is great to have good memories and it is great to look back with thankfulness. But sometimes suffering uses our good memories, not to celebrate the past but to emphasize the bitterness of the present. 

Those are the first 4 verses of this teeter-totter psalm. Despair, depression and discouragement surging up. An intense need for a God that doesn’t seem there. Tears, cries of the heart, lonely groans of suffering and a bitter nostalgia for something better. You can hear the discouragement in the psalmist’s voice. Can you hear it? Can you feel it in your own life or in the life of those you love?

Verse 5

In verse 5, the teeter-totter goes the other way. It is the refrain of the song; it is repeated again in verse 11 and again at the end of Psalm 43. Take a moment to read that verse.

Who is the author speaking to in this verse? He is speaking to himself, and that is important. He is not talking to God or to other people -- he is talking to himself. It is as if, in the middle of his suffering, he stops and says, “Wait a second, I don’t want to be a slave to my emotions. Instead of listening to myself, I’m going to speak to myself.” It is as if he stands up and says “Soul, listen up, I’m going to talk to you.”

What a great thing to develop in our own lives. Instead of listening to all the lies that pop up in their head, every Christian should speak truth to him or herself; every Christian should preach to him or herself. Instead of questioning God, the author of Psalm 42 now questions his own thoughts, his own emotions. “Why are you cast down O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me?” Thoughts, why are you so negative? Brain, why are you beating me up? Emotions, why are you pulling me down? The Psalmist examines his bad thought patterns, his wrong questions, his negative emotions, and then speaks truth to himself. He tries to replace the bad soul-sucking turmoil going on inside of him with truth. “Hope in God, for I will again praise him, my salvation and my God.”

This is biblical positive thinking. This is the truth of God that stabilizes us in moments of instability. The truth of God that helps us fight for joy in the hour of discouragement. Psalm 94:19 says it like this: “When the cares of my heart are many, your consolations cheer my soul.” In the turmoil of his soul, the psalmist trusts the Lord.

Trust in the Lord is not a passive state of mind. Trust is an act of the soul where we choose to hold tight to the promises of God, despite the discouragement that is threatening to overcome us. By an act of the will I decide to believe that God is the one that He says He is and that He will do what He says He will do. The psalmist is preaching to himself: “Hope in God, for I shall again praise him, my salvation and my God.” Brothers and sisters, preach the truth of God to yourself, replace the negativity with positive biblical thoughts and fight for joy in the hour of discouragement.

Verse 6-7

And now some of you who have or still do struggle with depression are saying, “That is nice Winston, but it isn’t that simple. You have no idea how dark it gets in here and how my brain and feelings just spiral out of control”. This psalm is not giving simple answers. Have a look at verses 6 and 7. The teeter-totter shifts again and the despair surges up once again.

The first line of verse 5 is: “Why are you cast down O my soul?” The first line of verse 6 is: “My soul is cast down within me.” Talk about a teeter-totter. His eyes are fixed again on his difficult circumstances. He thinks of God and the Promised Land, but he seems far away from all that. So instead of thinking of God as the source of salvation, he thinks of God as the source of suffering. It is as if God is breaking waves on him, pushing him into the deep end of depression and he doesn’t know how to swim. Deep calls to deep; all he can hear is despair.

When I was a teenager I did some surfing in Australia. When you are hit by a big breaking wave it is as if you are stuck in a washing machine on full spin cycle. I remember one time I was so disorientated that I tried to swim to the surface but instead swam to the bottom. That is not a bad picture of the disorientation of depression. When the deep is calling to the deep and the waves of depression and anxiety are breaking on your head, you can feel like a little wee thing bobbing around helplessly in an ocean of despair -- powerless, incapable, desperate. Do you ever feel like that? Do you know someone who feels like that? This psalm is not giving simplistic answers to life’s difficult problems. The Lord knows what you and those you love are going through, and he takes it seriously.

Verse 8

In verse 8 the teeter-totter goes the other way again with a radical swing of emotion. The discouragement goes down and hope and joy surge up again. It is as if the psalmist gets his head up above the water and all of a sudden he finds things calm. Please read it for yourself right now.

I love the phrase: “By day the Lord commands his steadfast love.” Steadfast love is our attempt in English to translate the word hesed in Hebrew. Hesed is God’s covenant goodness and mercy and faithfulness and grace for us despite all our weakness and despite all our faults. And according to this verse the Lord commands his hesed, his steadfast love, for us. He commands it. The love of God is not an afterthought; it is not something nice He tacks on at the end of a conversation. The love of God is not something that just floats around in the universe or in the church. God commands His love for you; He loves you with a particular and intentional love. His steadfast love is given, commanded, granted specifically and personally according to his sovereign desire and pleasure.

What a great thing to remember. In the middle of your disorientation, your depression, your discouragement, your topsy-turvy, teeter tottering emotions, remember that the Lord commands his steadfast love for you by day and at night his song is with you.

His song is with you. When deep calls to deep and despair drowns out everything else this Psalm is telling us that if you listen carefully you can hear the Lord singing his steadfast love to you. Can you hear it? Zephaniah 3:17 says it like this: “The Lord your God will rejoice over you with gladness…He will exult over you with loud singing.” The Lord commands and sings his magnificent covenant steadfast hesed love that injects hope into our hearts and helps us fight for joy in the hour of discouragement.

At the end of verse 8 the psalmist says this is a prayer to the God of my life. Stitch prayer through your day, through your life, in good times and bad, as the psalmist does. That is hard to do if you are feeling really down, which is why it is important to have a habit of prayer, so that even when you don’t feel like it you still do it. The thread of prayer stitched into the high and low parts of your life will help you fight for joy in the middle of discouragement.

Verse 9-10

We expect now to hear a prayer of praise and worship, but take a look at what it says in verse 9 and 10. What has happened? The teeter-totter has shifted again. Again there is sadness, again questioning, again the suffering of the soul. Sometimes emotions are like this. They are like springtime in Ottawa. There are days when the sun is out and it is getting warm and you are full of hope and you want to put on shorts and play basketball on the driveway. Then the next day it is a depressing minus 17 with a frostbite warning and you want to stay in bed. This is real life!

“God my rock” he says, “Why have you forgotten me? Why do I go mourning?” The questions keep piling up: When, O God? Where are you, O God? Why, O God? These are the questions that suffering asks. When? Where? Why?

There is a sense of oppression here. The psalmist feels bullied by his enemies, wounded, insulted by their questions, harassed by the expectations of others. Sometimes we feel the same way don’t we? Harassed by the well-intentioned but dumb questions and not so helpful advice of others. Sometimes we feel so discouraged we just want to hide somewhere, pull the covers over our heads and ignore the world. 

Taking a break from other people can be a good thing, but do you see how the author of Psalm 42 doesn’t take a break from God, even in the middle of his discouragement? He is still praying. When life has got you down, when the teeter-totter of despair is making you feel so very rotten, don’t let go of prayer, don’t stop communicating with God, and do your best to make it to church on Sunday. Pray your questions and your frustrations to him in the middle of discouragement just like how you pray your joy and thankfulness in the middle of encouragement.

Don’t get me wrong, I know this is hard. The psalmist says he has a deadly wound in his bones. Literally he says there is murder in my bones. He feels close to death. The laughter and jokes and lack of understanding of others, as well as our own dark thoughts that spin around and around in our heads, our suffering and pain, our depression and discouragement, these things can make us so tired, so exhausted and worn out that we can feel close to death, or even wish to die. There is not one moment in this psalm that the complexity of our pain and suffering and our teeter-totter emotions are not taken seriously. This is the Word of the Lord who has compassion on his children who suffer.

Verse 11

Sometimes our negative thoughts are like a toboggan roaring down the hill. It’s very difficult to stop once you get going. Often times our depressive thoughts turn up the volume of our worries and discouragement so high that the noise covers everything else. The challenge is to dig in our feet to stop the toboggan. The challenge is to turn the volume down so we can think straight, so that we hear the love song of the Lord and speak to our own soul. And that is what the author of this psalm does one more time in the last shift of the teeter-totter. The last verse (verse 11) brings us back to the refrain. This is the part to memorize, the part to sing in the car, the part to write out and put on your fridge.

Hope in God! Remember His promises. He is your salvation. He is your covenant God. He will not abandon you. He is and He was and He will always be your God of steadfast love. At the end of the psalm, it is hope that wins. And here is why. Hope will win because God has won. We suffer in this life and we don’t have all the answers of “when” and “where” and “why”. But we know the “who”! We know who God is. We know that God is not a distant God that stays far away from our suffering. We serve a covenant God who gives us Psalm 42 and who has entered into our suffering in Jesus Christ.

Jesus Christ cried out in agony, “My God my God, why have you abandoned me?” so that God would rejoice over you with gladness and loud singing. Jesus Christ descended on the teeter-totter into hell, but rose again from the dead so that God could command his steadfast hesed love to you.  Jesus Christ won, so that hope would win in your life, so that He could one day wipe every tear from your eyes.

Conclusion

So, when despair surges up in your life, fight for joy! Dig in your feet to stop the toboggan. Turn down the volume of your emotions. Listen for His singing, reminding you of His steadfast love and His salvation. Trust Him. Hold tight to His promises. Preach to yourself and remember who your God is in Jesus Christ. This psalm was designed to be sung. Sing it with your voice and with your heart. Sing it for yourself, for your family and friends, and for those struggling with despair and depression. Sing it with tears; sing it with hope. Fight for joy in the hour of discouragement.

Punya Banyak Pikiran?

   Jika saudara sering merasa gelisah atau cemas, itu memang hal yang normal, tetapi kadang-kadang kegelisahan itu menjadi lebih dari batas normal dan akhibatknya mengganggu hidup orang (mayoclinic.org,"Anxiety Disorders"). Kenapa ya, ada orang yang sifatnya cuek dan santai, dan ada orang yang sering gelisah, bahkan ada yang menjadi stres sampai berjalan-jalan di pinggir jalan dengan tidak teratur, bahkan ada yang membunuh dirinya sendiri? Menurut Mayo Clinic, penyebab anxiety disorder belum bertul-betul dipahami. Mereka berpikir bahwa pengalaman yang traumatis bisa memiculnya, tetapi ada banyak penyebab yang lain seperti stress karena adanya penyakit, stress yang lain dalam hidup sehari-hari yang bersifat pribadi, faktor genetik, akibat dari komsumsi obat terlarang atau akibat minuman  alkohol yang berkelebihan, dan lain sebagainya. Tetapi kurang jelas kenapa ada orang yang mengalami stress yang kelibihan sedangkan orang lain tidak.

    Saya sendiri merasa lebih banyak stress akhir-akhir ini, khususnya setelah Covid-19 muncul di dalam bumi ini. Saya tahu karena saya lebih cepat marah dan kecewa dan saya lebih sering mengalami kepala sakit dan perut sakit, dan saya gampang capek. Misalnya, kemarin ada beberapa hal yang terjadi yang menyebabkan rencana saya terganggu. Saya merasa sakit kepala dan "on edge". Tiba-tiba salah seorang  anak laki-laki saya pulang ke rumah dengan kakinya yang terluka dengan banayak aliran darah yang melele keluar dari lukanya. Biasanya saya bisa mengatasi hal seperti itu, tetapi karena "stress level" saya tinggi, maka saya langsung menelepon suami saya dengan berkata dengan nada agak tinggi, "Bapak di mana? Bapak cepat pulang dan mengobati kaki anak kita yang terluka karena saya tidak bisa lakukan itu!"

    Saya pikir bahwa "new normal" ini yang menyebabkan  saya merasa stress naik lebih tinggi. Hidup kita menjadi sangat berbeda dari pada sebelum Covid-19. Anak-anak kita sekarang belajar online dan itu mengharuskan kita untuk membeli laptop-laptop baru, mengatur internet yang kadang-kadang down dan low atau lemah, menyiapkan tempat belajar yang baik dan tenang untuk masing-masing anak agar mereka tidak terganggu oleh saudara-saudaranya yang lain, dan lain sebagainya. Selain itu, ada banyak peraturan dari pemerintah yang berubah dari waktu ke waktu. Juga, sosial media membuat kita pusing karena ada orang yang memposting atau forward informasi-informasi yang tidak benar alias hoax. Semua itu membuat otak saya menjadi penuh dan membuat saya menjadi stress  dari pada sebelumnya.

    Selain itu saya juga merasa kurang konek dengan orang-orang lain. Banyak keluarga saya tinggal jauh di luar negeri dan luar pulau. Oleh karena Covid-19, rencana perjalanan-perjalanan kami untuk kunjungi mereka atau mereka datang ke sini menjadi tidak memungkinkan. Kegiatan-kegiatan gerega, sekolah, dan komunitas harus melalui online sistem. Tidak ada kegiatan, rapat, atua pertemuan tatap muka. Itu sangat sulit karena kita adalah orang yang butuh sentuhan orang lain. Kita adalah orang bersifat sosial. Tuhan sudah menciptakan kita seperti begitu. Jadi tatkala kita sendiri-sendiri di dalam rumah setiap hari itu bisa membuat kita kurang sehat secara emosional dan psikologi.

     Mungkin saudara mengerti hal-hal yang saya sebut itu? Apakah saudara akhir-akhir ini bertambah banyak pikiran? Mazmur 94:19 katakan: "Apabila bertambah banyak pikiran dalam batinku, penghiburanMu menyenangkan jiwaku." Penghiburan Tuhan yang mana? Ada banyak sekali penghiburan di dalam Firman Tuhan, tetapi saya hanya memilih sembilan di sini untuk saudara bisa membaca... 

Yosua 1:9 "Bukankah telah Kuperintahkan kepadamu: kuatkan dan teguhkanlah hatimu? Janganlah kecut dan tawar hati, sebab TUHAN, Allahmu, menyertai engkau, ke manapun engkau pergi."

Mazmur 23:4 "Sekalipun aku berjalan dalam lembah kekelaman,  aku tidak takut bahaya, sebab Engkau besertaku; gada-Mu dan tongkat-Mu, itulah yang menghibur aku."

Ulangan 31:8 "Sebab TUHAN, Dia sendiri akan berjalan di depanmu, Dia sendiri akan menyertai engkau, Dia tidak akan membiarkan engkau dan tidak akan meninggalkan engkau; janganlah takut dan janganlah patah hati."

Yesaya 43:2 "Apabila engkau menyeberang melalui air, Aku akan menyertai engkau, atau melalui sungai-sungai, engkau tidak akan dihanyutkan; apabila engkau berjalan melalui api, engkau tidak akan dihanguskan, dan nyala api tidak akan membakar engkau."

1 Petrus 5:7 "Serahkanlah segala kekuatiranmu kepada-Nya, sebab Ia yang memelihara kamu."

Yesaya 40:31 "tetapi orang-orang yang menanti-nantikan  TUHAN mendapat kekuatan  baru: mereka seumpama rajawali yang naik terbang dengan kekuatan sayapnya; mereka berlari dan tidak menjadi lesu, mereka berjalan dan tidak menjadi lelah."

Yeremia 29:11 "Sebab Aku ini mengetahui rancangan-rancangan apa yang ada pada-Ku mengenai kamu, demikianlah firman TUHAN, yaitu rancangan damai sejahtera dan bukan rancangan kecelakaan, untuk memberikan kepadamu hari depan yang penuh harapan."

Amsal 3:5+6 "Percayalah kepada TUHAN dengan segenap hatimu, dan janganlah bersandar kepada pengertianmu sendiri. Akuilah Dia dalam segala lakumu, maka Ia akan meluruskan jalanmu."

Mathias 28:20(b) "Dan ketahuilah, Aku menyertai kamu senantiasa sampai kepada akhir zaman."

    Apabila pikiran dalam otak kita bertambah banyak dan kita menjadi  stress atau kawatir , marilah kita membaca ayat-ayat Firman Tuhan ini agar kita mendapat kekuatan dari Tuhan dan agar Dia dapat mengenyangkan dan menyegarkan jiwa-jiwa kita. 

Tuhan memberkati .

Referensi:

https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/anxiety/symptoms-causes/syc-20350961https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/anxiety/symptoms-causes/syc-20350961

Are You Having Anxious Thoughts?

    Anxiety is very common. According to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America, in the U.S. anxiety disorders affect 18.1% of the population every year. Why do people experience it? According to the Mayo Clinic, the causes are still not fully understood. They say that traumatic life experiences could trigger anxiety but that many other factors could make people at risk such as stress due to an illness, other stress build up, certain personality types, genetics, misuse of drugs or alcohol, etc. 

    Personally, I have felt an increase in anxiety in the last few months. I am more easily upset, I experience headaches more often, and when a few unexpected things happen I very easily feel like "I can't handle this!" Like yesterday, a few unexpected twists in my day occurred so that my original plans were messed up. I felt increasing tension in my head and I felt very vulnerable. Then my oldest boy walked into the house with a bloody foot. That was all it took to set me off. I called my husband on my cell phone and asked in a strained voice, "Where are you? What are you doing? Can you please come home right now and clean up this blood because I can't handle this!" Whereas back in January, although I probably would not have been happy to clean up that blood and bandage my son's foot, I definitely would have been able to manage it. So why this change in my ability to handle life?

    I have been thinking a lot about this lately. I realize that my mental health is not what it was before. I have been following Emma McAdam on her Youtube Channel called "Therapy in a Nutshell" and I agree with what she says in her video called "Daily Habits to Prevent Depression". She says that we need to exercise daily maintenance for our mental health in the same way that we do for our physical health. I highly recommend checking out her videos if you or a loved one is experiencing high levels of anxiety, stress or depression. She is a marriage and family therapist who explains things very simply and clearly and gives useful and practical advise from a christian worldview. I will put a link on the bottom of this post if you are interested in checking out that youtube channel. 

    I believe that the main thing that has set me off lately is this "new normal" that we are currently living in. Life has been totally changed since pre-Covid times. Our kids are all doing online schooling, which in itself is quite something to manage. I have to make sure each of our five kids that are schooling right now have a working electronic device, that the internet is working properly (the internet goes up and down here in Indonesia), and that they have a regular, quiet place in which to work -- somewhere in our not-very-big house. At the beginning, we had a high schooler upstairs studying. After two incidents where we got a phone call from a teacher asking where he was (and he was found to be sleeping!) we decided no kids upstairs except for our university student. We also had our young elementary student studying in her bedroom, until we found out that she was accessing things on internet not meant for little eyes. So we had to make another rule -- young kids must study within our view. What a lot of things to think about and manage!! Besides online schooling to manage, there are constantly changing rules and regulations due to the changing Covid situation. Besides this, being bombarded with many different opinions on social media and trying to sort through what is true and what is false information. All this can be stressful!

    However, besides all these things, there is one thing that I feel has most greatly affected me and that is the lack of community and connectedness due to Covid restrictions. My family is on the other side of the world and I'm not sure I would even be given permission to travel there, since only those who have a nonessential reason may go in and out of the country. My husband's family is across the country in a place which has less developed medical facilities. Most people in our neighborhood stay for the majority of the day in their houses. And there are no physical gatherings for worship services, school activities or community events. I almost feel like my family and I are on a deserted island. I feel so disconnected!

    Now you may or may not have been nodding your head as I described some of my anxious thoughts. You may or may not be feeling the same way. However, most people do experience some form of anxiety in their lives at some point, and I know that more people are feeling higher levels of anxiety since Covid started. So I want to share this verse that a friend shared with me recently. Psalm 94:19 says, "When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought joy to my soul." When I read this verse, I pondered for a while...Your consolation? What consolation does God give me that could bring joy to my soul? God gives us many words of consolation in the Bible, but here are nine especially beautiful verses that I was reminded of...

Joshua 1:9 "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go."

Psalm 23:4 "Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me."

Deuteronomy 31:8 "The Lord Himself goes before you and will be with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged."

Isaiah 43:2 "When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze."

1 Peter 5:7 "Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you."

Isaiah 40:31 "But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."

Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

Proverbs 3:5+6 "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight."

Matthew 28:20(b) "And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age."

I could have hidden my anxious thoughts so that no one would know about them -- indeed that would have been the safer option! -- but instead I chose to bare my soul today in this post. I did that in the hopes that by sharing about my feelings of anxiety, others who are experiencing anxiety in their life might know that they are not alone and find comfort. And, when anxious thoughts are great within you and I, may these beautiful verses that I have shared -- God's words of consolation -- bring great joy to our souls.

Sources:

https://adaa.org/about-adaa/press-room/facts-statistics#:~:text=Anxiety%20disorders%20are%20the%20most,of%20those%20suffering%20receive%20treatment.

https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/anxiety/symptoms-causes/syc-20350961https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/anxiety/symptoms-causes/syc-20350961

Emma McAdam's Youtube Channel:

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCpuqYFKLkcEryEieomiAv3Q

Prioritas Saya di Mana?

     Pada hari Rabu, 16 September, 2020, saya memposting blog saya yang pertama. Sejak tanggal itu, setiap minggu saya menerbitkan artikel baru. Namun minggu lalu merupakan yang pertama kali saya tidak menerbitkan artikel yang baru. Mungkina ada yang bertanya menagapa? Dibawah ini adalah ceritanya...

    Beberapa bulan yang lalu saya temukan bahwa ternyata ada penyerangan kutu busuk di dalam tempat tidur anak-anak saya. Itu sangat menjengkelkan saya. Saya paling tidak suka dengan serangga ini. Saya kira banyak dari kita yang sama seperti saya karena serangga ini sangat mengganggu hidup dan waktu istirahat kita. Akibat saya mengambil keputusan untuk segera membersihkan setiap ruangan di dalam rumah saya secara seksama dan seakurat mungkin sampai ke akar dan telur-telur serta semua tempat persembunyian mereka. Setelah satu minggu bekerja keras, saya berpikir bahwa semua kutu busuk itu sudah dibasmi secara tuntas. Saya pun bisa tidur pulas dan nyenyak. Ternyata, satu minggu kemudian, saat saya tidur di tempat tidur, saya kaget melihat beberapa kutu busuk di atas tempat tidur saya! Saya jujur di sini, saya bukan hanya kecewa tetapi saya benar-benar marah! Saya marah kepada diri saya sendiri karena saya telah mengambil keputusan yang keliru, di mana waktu memasuki rumah ini, menggunakan saja beberapa kasur lama dari pemilik yang lama yang tidak dipakai tanpa meneliti dengan baik sebelum menggunakannya. Saya juga marah karena waktu pertama kali bersihkan rumah, saya tidak bersihkan kamar saya dengan baik dan tidak terlalu teliti. Saya berpikir mereka tidak mungkin sampai di kamar saya. Saya marah karenanya kami mendapat masalah ini.

    Tetapi, meskipun marah, saya tetap harus membersihkan ulang lagi. Membersihkan SEMUAnya. Saya tidak mau ada kutu busuk satu ekorpun dalam rumah saya lagi. Jadi saya bersihkan semua -- tempat tidur termasuk sofa, lemari pakaian, seluruh pakain, dll. Tangan saya menjadi keram setiap hari karena saya harus membersihkan semua sepatu, boneka-boneka anak-anak, dll. Bahu, pungung,  pingging dan belakang saya terasa sakit sekali. Bukan itu saja, tiba-tiba dada saya merasa tertikam. Meskipun sudah diobati bahkan diurutpun masih sakit. Bahkan, sakitnya merasa tertusuk sampai di belakang saya. Saya tidak bisa bergerak. Ketika saya tidurpun sangat sakit. Bahkan saat saya batuk atau bernafas  ecara dalam, air mata saya terasa mau jatu karena sakitnya luar biasa. Malam itu saya sulit tidur; sampai sekitar jam satu pagi baru bisa tertidur.

    Besok pagi, setelah saya bangun dari tidur, saya sadar bahwa ternyata saya sudah bekerja terlalu banyak dan akhibatnya sekarang saya tidak bisa bekerja lagi karena harus istirahat. Tenaga saya mungkin hilang kekuatan sekitar 50% dari biasanya. Badan saya terasa sakit dan kaku. Saya ingin selesaikan pekerjaan saya membersihkan rumah saya tetapi saya sudah tidak mampu lagi. 

Sambil berbaring di tempat tidur pagi itu, saya tiba-tiba sadar bahwa akhir-akhir ini saya hampir-hampir tidak berdoa dan membaca Firman Tuhan lagi. Saya sudah fokus betul-betul di kutu busuk yang ada di rumah saya dan lupa Tuhan!

    Saya langsung mengambil Alkitab saya dan pergi ke ruang meditasi kami, di mana saya biasa membuat perenungan dan saya mulai berdoa kepada Tuhan. Saya meminta Tuhan untuk menolong saya dalam pekerjaan di dalam rumah yang ada. Saya lalu diingatkan pada satu ayat Firman Tuhan. Di dalam Matius 6 ayat 33 katakan demikian: "Tetapi carilah dahulu Kerajaan Allah dan kebenaranNya, dan semuanya itu akan ditambahkan kepadamu." Wow. Luar biasa. Saya ditegor saat itu. Prioritas saya di mana? Apakah beberapa binatang kecil di dalam rumah saya lebih penting dari pada mencari Kerajaan Allah dan kebenaranNya? Tentu tidak. Memang kutu busuk menjengkelkan dan bisa membuat orang kecewa atau marah. Bahkan mereka bisa membuat badan kita lemah kalau kita memaksakan diri bekerja keras untuk membersihkannya dari rumah. Tetapi kita tidak boleh ijinkan mereka untuk mengacaukan prioritas kita untuk Tuhan dan KerajaanNya. Kita tidak boleh ijinkan mereka untuk merusak visi kita di dalam hidup. Yaitu, paling penting di atas semuanya adalah bagaimana saya bisa memajukan kerajaan Allah dan memuji nama Tuhan. 

Carilah dahulu Kerajaan Allah dan membuat goal atau tujuan utama dan pertama untuk mendapatkan kebenaran dan kehidupan yang suci di hadapan Tuhan. Apakah saudara juga punya "kutu busuk" di dalam hidup saudara? Mungkin tidak sama seperti yang saya sedang alami -- serangga-serangga kecil-kecil yang suka hidup di dalam kasur orang dan yang membuat badan gatal-- tetapi mungkin saudara  menghadapi masalah yang lain yang kurang enak, menjengkelkan, melemahkan, atau membuat saudara sedih, kecewa atau marah? 

Lewat kesempatan ini saya ingin menguatkan saudara. Saudara pasti bisa menyelesaikan masalah itu. Tetaplah kerja agar dapat menyelesaikan masalah itu. Kalaupun saudara ingin menangis -- itu pun tidak salah. Kalau itu menolong, silahkan berteriak dan menangis. Tetapi apapun yang saudara buat, ingat bahwa mencari kerajaan Allah dan kebenaranNya haruslah nomor satu dalam hidup saudara. Jangan lupa prioritas ini. Puji Tuhan tidak akan ada kutu busuk di sorga. Di sorga tidak akan ada kerja yang begitu melelahkan atau frustrasi, atau air mata, atau kesedihan. Di sorga hanya ada sukacita dan kebahagiaan. Kiranya itu menjadi motivasi dan obat tatkala kutu busuk datang menyerang saudara dan saya.

Where Are My Priorities?

     I published my first two blog posts on Wednesday, September 16, 2020. I wrote new blogs faithfully every week after that, in the middle of the week. But last week I did not write any new blog at all. "So what happened?" you may be wondering. Well, I'll tell you what happened, albeit somewhat sheepishly...

    Let's backtrack first to a couple months ago. It was then that I realized one day that some tiny little creatures, commonly called bedbugs, were sharing sleeping space with some of my children. Ugh! But nevertheless, I went to work with vigor and enthusiasm to get rid of those nasty little creatures. After about one week of hard, persistent work, I felt quite confident that my house was once more bedbug free. Then last week one night, as I was getting into bed, I found a couple of those detestable little creatures on the headboard of my bed! I had cleaned out part of my room that first time, but not very thoroughly because I didn't really think that they could possibly have spread to my bedroom. But obviously I was wrong. Ugghhh!! I was frustrated. No, let me be totally honest -- I was MAD!! I was angry with the original owner of the house for leaving me her bedbug infested mattresses, and I was mad at myself for not being more thorough the first time I had tried to get rid of them. And I was just mad that this could have happened to me and my family. 

    But, angry or not, I forced myself to start the whole process over. Work, work, work. I went to bed each night exhausted because of all the hard work I had done, yet wishing I had been able to accomplish more. Each night I went to sleep thinking, "What if some bugs come out of the places I haven't cleaned yet while we are sleeping, and go to the clean places?" And I freaked out more than once when a mosquito stung me during the night, because I thought it was a bedbug!

    Then one night, after almost a week of hard work, my body couldn't take it anymore. Both my hands had been getting numb off and on during the day, and I had had to massage them and flex them to get the feeling back in them. But that night something worse happened. I felt a sharp pain in my chest. I asked my husband to massage my shoulder and neck, thinking it might be a pulled muscle. But as he massaged, the pain only got worse. It was shooting into my back as well. When I tried to lie on my left side the pain became excruciating! When I coughed, the pain was so bad it brought tears to my eyes. Finally, shortly after one o'clock in the morning. I was able to doze off. 

     When I woke up the next morning (which was yesterday morning) the pain had subsided somewhat, but I knew for a fact that I could not expect to continue my de-bugging. My body was stiff and sore, and I felt the pain in my chest each time I leaned over, expended any amount of energy or even took a deep breath. I realized my body was over-worked and I had maybe 50% of my usual energy. "Now what was I going to do?" I thought with panic."In a couple months time, will I see some more bedbugs in another part of the house, because I had not finished cleaning everything?" But I realized that even if that were the case, there was nothing I could do about it.

    After some reflection while lying on my bed that morning, I realized with a pang of conscience that I had done very little personal devotions during my frenzied week of de-bugging the house. So I decided that since I didn't have the energy or good health to continue the work that day, I would spend some personal time with my Father in heaven. I took my Bible, and went upstairs to my little "meditation room" ( a very small room the size of a walk-in closet). I began to pray, poring out my lamentations to God. I asked God, among other things, for guidance with this frustrating situation. And do you want to know what verse God brought to my mind? Matthew 6:33: "But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." Wow. That was an eye-opener for me. Yes, bedbugs are annoying, frustrating, anger-inducing, and can even wear one's body down if one tries to get rid of them all at once, But I needed to make sure they weren't messing up my priorities. They can even reduce one to tears at times. But I should not let them ruin my vision or my focus in life. 

    Seek first God's kingdom. Make it your primary goal to obtain righteousness and live a holy life. If you have some bedbugs in your life right now -- maybe not the little black ones that try to live in your sleeping mattress and cause you to itch, but some other unpleasant, exhausting, or frustrating problem that is invading your life -- then I want to encourage you. Keep on dealing with that problem. I believe you can do it. Cry if you feel like it. Yell if it helps. But whatever you do, remember that seeking God's kingdom and His righteousness in still number one priority. Praise God -- there will be no bedbugs in heaven, or anything that those bedbugs might symbolize for you. There will be no tiresome work  either, or tears, or frustration, or sadness. There will be only eternal joy and gladness. May that motivate us and soothe us when times are tough. 

Hidup Yang Bermakna -- Bagian Ke2

    Setalah membaca artikel saya yang terakhir tentang kehidupan yang bermakna, ada seorang subscriber merasa sedikit bersalah lalu menyatakan kepada saya demikian: "Setelah saya membaca tulisan ibu, saya berpikir bahwa kehidupan saya akan menjadi kurang bermakna jika hidup saya terlalu sibuk." Saya merenungkan pernyataan itu beberapa waktu, lalu saya mengambil keputusan untuk menulis sebuah artikel lanjutan tentang hidup yang bermakna.

    Memang benar, kehidupan kita akan cenderung menjadi kurang bermakna kalau kita terlalu sibuk. Namun, itu bukan berarti bahwa kita sama sekali tidak boleh sibuk. Jadi hidup yang bermakna atau kurang bermakna tidak tergantung pada berapa banyak kesibukan kita. Ada sesuatu yang lain yang menentukan hidup kita bermakna atau kurang bermakna. Tergantung bagaimana kita mengatur kesibukan kita. Dan setiap kita harus mengevaluasi diri sendiri dan hidupnya sendiri.

    Setelah membaca empat kitab yang pertama di Perjanjian Baru (yaitu Matius, Markus, Lukas dan Yohanes) saya berkesimpulan bahwa Tuhan Yesus sangat sibuk tatkala Dia hidup di muka bumi ini sebagai manusia. Kesibukannya, antara lain, mengajar murid-muridNya secara pribadi, berkhautbah kepada banyak orang di berbagai tempat, berbicara dengan orang-orang secara pribadi tatkala mereka mencariNya, menjawab pertanyaan-pertanyaan dari orang-orang Farisi yang mencobaiNya, menyembuhkan banyak orang yang sakit, mengusir roh-roh jahat, membangkitkan orang-orang dari kematian, dan membuat banyak mujizat yang lainnya. Tuhan Yesus membuat semua itu dengan satu tujuan yaitu untuk menunjukan diriNya sebagai Mesias yang dijanjikan dan untuk mengarahkan pikiran orang-orang kepada penyalibanNya di kayu salib serta semua perkerjaan dan penderitaanNya di kayu salib. 

Namun di tengah-tengah kesibukannya, Tuhan Yesus masih mengambil waktu untuk pergi ke tempat yang sunyi agar supaya Dia bisa berdoa kepada BapaNya di surga. Markus 1:35 berbunyi demikian: "Pagi-pagi benar, waktu hari masih gelap, Ia bangun dan pergi ke luar. Ia pergi ke tempat yang sunyi dan berdoa di sana."  Luar biasa sekali saudara-saudari! Saya terpaksa berpikir bahwa kalau Tuhan Yesus yang adalah Anak Allah perlu waktu yang khusus untuk berdoa sendiri kepada BapaNya, apalagi saya! Memang, kalau kita tidak mengambil waktu yang cukup untuk berbicara dengan Bapa surgawi kita dan untuk membaca FirmanNya yang membawa kehidupan, kita pasti akan hilang energi, semangat dan fokus. Kita juga akan kehilangan kemampuan untuk berpikir -- dan berbuat -- hal-hal yang positif dalam kehidupan kita.

    Saya membaca satu artikel yang berbunyi: "Is Jesus missing from your busy life?" Dalam bahasa Indonesia terjemahan bebasnya: Adakah Yesus di dalam kesibukan hidup saudara? Dalam artikel tersebut Allison Moore sebagi penulisnya berkata bahwa untuk mendapatkan hidup yang bermakna sangat simpel yaitu selalu menghadirkan Yesus dalam segala kesibukan hidup. Ini adalah website yang bisa saudara buka untuk membaca artikel yang saya sebutkan diatas: https://newspring.cc/articles/is-jesus-whats-missing-from-your-life. 

    Allison mencatat delapan cara yang sangat menolong untuk menghadirkan Yesus di dalam kesibukan hidup kita yaitu: berdoa, mendengar (Roh Kudus), membaca Alkitab, mengasihi orang lain dengan benar, melayani orang lain, sering memuji nama Tuhan Yesus, dan bersyukur kepada Tuhan. Kalau jadwal kita begitu padat dengan kegiatan-kegiatan kita (meskipun mungkin kegiatannya bersifat rohani) sehingga kita tidak mempunyai waktu untuk memenuhi delapan hal yang diatas, maka kehidupan kita akan menjadi benar-benar kurang berarti. Akan tetapi, kalau kita, meskipun sangat sibuk, namun kita mampu mengambil waktu untuk berdoa kepada Bapa surgawi kita, seperti yang dibuat oleh Tuhan Yesus, maka hidup kita menjadi bermakna. Kenapa begitu? Karena berdoa dan membaca Firman Tuhan menolong kita menjadi berfokus untuk memuliakan nama Tuhan dan melayani orang lain.

    Saya tidak tahu tentang kehidupan saudara, tetapi saya sendiri ingin mempunyai suatu kehidupan yang lebih berarti. Hidup kita berbeda antara satu dengan yang lainnya: situasi yang berbeda, budaya yang berbeda, keluarga yang berbeda, talenta-talenta dari Tuhan yang berbeda, serta panggilan yang berbeda. Akan tetapi, jikalau saudara dan saya mempunyai kehidupan yang bermakna, maka kehidupan kita akan kelihatan sama. Mengapa? Karena kita sama-sama memiliki akar dan dasar hidup yang sama dalam Kristus. Kolose 2 ayat 6 dan 7 berbunyi demikian: "Kamu telah menerima Kristus Yesus, Tuhan kita. Karena itu hendaklah hidupmu tetap di dalam Dia. Hendaklah kamu berakar di dalam Dia dan bangun di atas Dia, hendaklah kamu bertambah tegu dalam iman yang telah diajarkan kepadamu, dan hendaklah hatimu melimpah dengan syukur." 

Kiranya Firman Tuhan dan Roh Kudus membimbing kita semua agar kita makin mengetahui cara yang diinginkan Tuhan dalam hidup kita, dan makin lama makin mempunyai hidup yang luar biasa berarti secara surgawi. Kiranya nama Tuhan dipuji di dalam hidup kita masing-masing!

Wholesome Living -- Part 2

    After my last blog on wholesome living, a reader (perhaps a little guiltily) made the following comment: "I can only conclude that being too busy is not wholesome living..." I chewed on that statement for the next 24 hours and then decided to write a second blog on wholesome living. I believe that our lives can certainly become unwholesome if we are too busy. But I also believe that just because we have a busy life does not inherently mean that it is unwholesome. Each of of us will have to evaluate their own life, daily schedule, and the activities that they are involved with, and then decide whether or not their life is wholesome.

    I think we can conclude after reading the first four books of the New Testament that Jesus Himself was a busy man when He was on earth. He healed the sick, taught His disciples privately, preached to crowds of people, had one-on-one conversations with people who were searching, answered questions from the Pharisees and the teachers of the law who were trying to trap Him by His words, healed many sick people, drove out demons, raised people from the dead, and performed various other miracles. He did all of those things for one purpose: to show people that He was the promised Messiah, and to point people to the work that He was going to do for them on the cross. Yet, in the midst of all His busy-ness He still manged to carve out time to be alone and pray. Mark 1:35 says, "Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where He prayed." That just blows my mind away. If Jesus -- the Son of God -- needed to have that concentrated time alone with His Father, how much more do I need it?! If I don't get plenty of time to talk with my Father in Heaven and to read His life-giving Word, I am pretty sure that I will lose my energy and my focus in life and I will lose my ability to think (and act) positively... In short, I will lose the wholesomeness that is in my life. 

    In an article entitled, "Is Jesus missing from your busy life?", Allison Moore says, "The most abundant life is quite simple. The abundant life is more of Jesus" (https://newspring.cc/articles/is-jesus-whats-missing-from-your-life). She lists eight ways that would help us get "more of Jesus": be still, pray, listen, read the Bible, love others well, serve someone else, praise Jesus often, and give back. If our schedules are so filled with work, responsibilities, and "activities" or "programs" (whether of a religious nature or not) that we do not have time for those very important activities that Allison mentions, I think our lives may indeed be in danger of being unwholesome. However, if we are very busy, yet still have that "time alone" like Jesus did to maintain proper focus in life, and we are glorifying God and serving our neighbors by what we are doing (and not just driven by a desire to get rich or become famous) then that is also a wholesome life.  

    I don't know about you, but I would like to have a more wholesome and abundant life. On the outside, my life may end up looking very different from yours because we are in different situations, have different families, have different talents, and may also have different callings from God. But if we both have a wholesome life, then our lives will be similar in that they will both be rooted in Christ."So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live your lives in Him, rooted and built up in Him, strengthened in the faith, as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness" (Col.2:6+7). May His Word and the Holy Spirit guide each one of us to know more and more how He wants us to live out that wholesome and abundant life. And may He be glorified through it all!